Do alternative parenting arrangements work?

This case follows hot on the heels of a decision made not long ago by a High Court judge, dealing with a long and bitter dispute about the role of gay donor dads to two children being raised by their lesbian mothers (the P & L (Minors) [2011] case).

The “novelty factor” of these cases clearly make them more newsworthy than those concerning the many traditional family set-ups that unfortunately fail on a regular basis. Arguably, such negative publicity is unhelpful in circumstances where LGBT people the world over are still battling for equality in rights that facilitate the creation of stable families – the obvious ones being marriage, adoption and general parental rights. However, these cases do raise important questions relating to children born into alternative families and beg the question: are alternative parenting arrangements more susceptible to failure?

The key issue in dispute in the DN v MD and AR [2012] case was the women’s desire to create “a two-parent lesbian nuclear family”. The biological mother claims that the father had initially agreed to forgo his paternal rights. However, when the baby was born, the father changed his mind and sought to have a paternal relationship with the child. The case illustrates that one can end up co-parenting, even if this was not the original intention. As Lady Black in the Court of Appeal eloquently stated: “No matter how detailed their agreement, no matter what formalities they adopt, this is not a dry legal contract. Biology, human nature and the hand of fate are liable to undermine it and to confound their expectations.”  Read More